Our Wedding // Wedding planning

One of my many Pintrest boards for our wedding. You can see more of it here.

When I first started blogging two years ago, I could not wait to get engaged so I could blog about the whole thing. I swear, I wrote post drafts fantasizing about what I would actually write when I was wedding planning (embarrassing). I made board after board on pintrest about my dream weddings, which, by the way, I had many dream weddings, so my pinning it was quite obsessive. When I actually got engaged, life was crazy busy and I was overwhelmed. I sifted through my pintrest boards, trying to find my style and create a vision for our day, but there were just too many dang choices. There were too many vendors to choose from, from photography to caterers to florists, as well as design layouts and napkin colors and decor ideas and guest favors. Pintrest became my worst nightmare. I changed my mind every other week and gave my planner (who was thankfully my best friend and had to love me no matter what) a heart attack whenever he saw my number pop up on his phone. Not to mention, I was THE BIGGEST control freak. Like, I redid my to-do list every day, emailed my family with weekly to-do lists, and would spastically freak out when I forgot to do a significant errand or was behind on my "list" (that damn list....). We chose a style "relaxed garden party" (It sounds ridiculous, I know) and after months of feeling overwhelmed by decisions I knew I just had to trust that it was going to all work out. And in the end, the day was more beautiful and perfect than any Pintrest board I could have ever imagined.

I can't wait to finally document my wedding planning process because even though it's only been six month since our wedding, if feels like it was years ago and I don't want to forget any of it.

OH yeah, I'm getting married in two weeks

When I first started reading blogs I knew that when I got engaged I wanted to use my blog as a way to record the planning process and gather inspiration. I fantasized on weekly wedding updates with inspiration boards, the planning, and my thoughts and feelings of this entire engagement.

Now, two weeks before my wedding and in the midst of way too many DIY projects, logistical nightmares, and rereading vendor contracts, I thought it was as good a time as any to write my first wedding blog post. I mean, what better way to procrastinate than doing something completely non essential during the business time of your life, right?

The past year of my life has been a whirlwind, to say the least. As I've mentioned in many posts before, last fall was a crazy time with getting engaged in August, attending a working in September and traveling a ton, photographing my second wedding in November, and traveling and celebrating the holidays in December. And then, in May, I decided to quit my part time desk job and completely focus on building my photography business. I thought that making that decision would free up more time to build my brand AND plan for the wedding. But, of course, as soon as I decided to focus full time on photography my business grew exponentially and I ended up booked almost every weekend with weddings and shoots, photographing families, traveling to Puerto Rico to photograph a president's club trip, and spent the majority of my week days editing and communicating with clients.  I kept saying "as soon as things slow down, I'll be able to focus on ____", continually pushing things back until I had "more time". Well, as I've quickly realized, I'll never have "more time" and will always have a ten page to-do list. So this past year has been full of prioritizing between wedding planning, building my business, and spending way too many nights drinking my 10th cup of tea at 8pm and hunkering down to edit/email/attempt to plan our wedding.

I thought that I would LOVE wedding planning. I have been obsessed with wedding blogs for years and my favorite pintrest boards are my wedding boards, but as soon as I had to sit down and focus on what I wanted for MY wedding, I freaked. There are so many good ideas, so many creative, unique, beautiful ideas, that I had the hardest time narrowing down what I wanted and what fit US. I've seen so many things through my own weddings and blogs, so it was hard to think up something unique that I haven't seen a million times. When we finally did decide on a theme/ ideas/ venues, I second guested EVERYTHING, and I'm still second guessing my decisions today.  I guess it's the pressure of hosting 150 people and being in the industry and wanting it to be perfect.  I had a few months where I would freak out for a few weeks and be so focused on wedding planning, and then get so over it and freak out and not do anything for the wedding for months and focus solely on my business. And then a few months later the whole process would start again. As I said, it's been a crazy last year.

The weird part is, I keep forgetting what the whole point of the wedding is. I keep forgetting that the details don't matter, the schedule doesn't matter, the logistics don't matter (well.. they kind of do... ) but the whole point of having this whole celebration is that Jack and I are getting married. I've been so far removed from the ceremony part of the planning, letting Jack and his dad (who will be our officiant) handle the ceremony planning. But when I feel super stressed or overwhelmed, I keep thinking that in two weeks Jack will be my husband. HUSBAND. After 10 years of being together, we will be married. Ten years ago we were just kids, driving out to the beach in West Marin, snuggling under blankets and star gazing, dreaming of our futures and planning out our adult lives. We'd go to college, either together or apart, and meet back up after college to live in a big city together - probably New York or San Francisco - then I'd be a traveling photojournalist and we'd get to travel the world for a few years - then we'd settle down on a ranch somewhere with a white fence, a barn, and a rope swing from a big tree out front for our kids to play on. These dreams were always just that - dreams - but now that we are getting married I keep thinking back to those dreams and realize that we're making those childhood fantasies a reality. It was always a given that we'd get married and have kids, but that always seemed like such a distant future. But now, it's a reality. We are now living those childhood fantasies and living out our dreams. It's a surreal feeling and one that I am so grateful to be able to have.

The next two weeks are going to be spent finishing up (or starting...) DIY projects for the day, gathering last minute decorations, finalizing schedules and timelines, and finishing building projects in the backyard. My parents have completely transformed their home into the most amazing wedding venue, completely with a gorgeous, buzzing garden, a grapevine arbor that we get to dine under, and beautiful flowers and plans to line the yard. It's truly amazing what they've done to make this day exactly how I imagined, and I'm beyond grateful for their tireless hard work and commitment to making this day amazing. Plus, after the wedding we're going to have a SWEET backyard!

And my amazing fiance - what can I say. We've definitely struggled a bit with finding balance between wedding planning, business building, traveling, family and friends time, and finding time for us, but all of the arguments and stress we've felt has only brought us closer. I'm beyond excited to marry childhood sweetheart and be his wife. I'm so excited to be able to plan our lives together for reals, to be one unit forever and always, and to build a beautiful family together. Plus, we decided last minute to book a 10 day honeymoon in Kauai for right after the wedding, which I'm pretty excited about too.

And with that, I'm out. Time to go stamp and cut and tie and assemble until my hands are bruised.

Engagement Photos by Josh Gruetzmacher

The first thing I did when we got engaged was start reaching out to photographers. As a wedding photographer myself, I had certain requirements and high expectations from our future photographer, and I am SO happy with our decision to go with Josh Gruetzmacher, a film art film photographer based here in San Francisco. I had been following him on Instagram for months and he was so welcoming and easy going that I knew we had to have him. We had an engagement session in January on the most gorgeous day in Marin (seriously, it was 80 and sunny with no fog in sight) and we decided to go back to Mt. Tam to where we got engaged. It was so special being back there and I had a blast being on the other side of the camera for once, even though I was super awkward in the beginning. I can't wait to have Josh photograph our wedding!!

All photos are taken by Josh Gruetzmacher

January in Review

January's over? What?  This month BLEW by, like, speedy gonzales fast blew by. And I'm sad to say that not much was significant or accomplish, except for finalizing some wedding plans. I never knew that wedding planning would be this time consuming- I always knew that there was a lot to do for planning a wedding and that brides became crazy during the whole process- but I never fully understood it until I became one of those crazy brides. For example, last week I had at least one vendor call every day after work, which usually takes about a half hour to an hour, and then had to research more options, look at contracts, respond to emails, and try to make a decision on who we want to be our DJ or do our flowers or be our caterer. If I were a genius I would create a site (like the Knot but completely bias) that compares pricing, has reviews, and has EVERY vendor in the area in order to streamline the process and help brides navigate the wedding industry. If I've learned one thing from this planning process it's that it's so important to make it easy as possible for the bride.

Anyways, looking back at the month of January, it's no wonder it feel like it flew by. Each weekend was jam packed with activities and events and was a great forecast to how great 2014 will hopefully be!

- Had an amazing last week in Park City by going on lots of snow shoeing adventures, cooking delicious feasts, and playing way too many games of Stratego by the fire
- We had an AMAZING engagement shoot with our photographer where we revisited the place we got engaged!
- Our photographer, Josh Gruetzmacher, invited me to tag along at a styled shoot that he organized and it was the most amazing, inspiring experience.
-  I had an amazing engagement shoot with Hanna & Justin, whose wedding I'm going to photograph next June. We explored Crissy Field and I had such a blast catching up with them!
- I second shoot a gorgeous winter wedding for Andi Hatch. The groom was so emotional and excited, and it was such an honor to be a part of their day
- We had the most epic reunion with my best friends from high school reminiscing about our crazy high school adventures and catching up on the last few years of our lives
- We had a fitting at Bella Bridesmaid for my bridesmaid's dresses (I can't wait share them with you!) and attended a fun bridal show at Ramekins
- We tasted some amazing caterers for our wedding
- I caught up with a college friend (who was actually my "big sis" in our sorority!) and did a really fun yoga/head shots shoot in downtown SF. It was awesome.
- Finally, we picked out our wedding rings! It was one of my favorite parts of wedding planning so far and made everything so real. I loved seeing that ring on Jack's finger!

Looking back at 2013

It's safe to say that 2013 has been the best and most challenging year of my life. From quitting a horrible job in order to pursue a happier lifestyle, to finally feeling like I've found a career I love, to getting engaged to the love of my life... it's been an exciting and terrifying year with memories and experiences I'll cherish forever.

2013 has been the year of taking risks. After two years of sitting in a cubicle at a horrible job that made me miserably unhappy, I decided to quit my full time job in order to pursue something that made me happy. I had two months of unemployment to reevaluate my life, and this time off helped me recharge and figure out who I wanted to be. It was terrifying not knowing where my next rent check would come from, but thanks to the support of my amazing family and Jack, I was able to remove myself from a toxic environment and take the necessary step to making myself happy.

It's been the year of "firsts". This year has surprised me by handing me a load of new experiences, new friends, and new adventures that I never imagined I would have. From starting my own business to meeting my photographic idol, I've been blown away by the unbelievable opportunities that I've been blessed with. I never thought in my wildest dreams that I would be able to assist an amazing fine art photographer, which would open doors to so many other life changing opportunities. I never imagined I would be building my own business and have the chance to photograph one wedding, let alone two, and be able to learn from so many other photographers as a second shooter. I never ever believed that I would be able to learn from Jose Villa at one of his workshops and be able to sit in a room with so many other unbelievable photographers as their peer. From having my first "official" photo shoot in January to manning my own business with weekends fully booked with shoots, this year has been a year of tremendous growth.

It's been the year of imbalance. In January I decided to unofficially (read: made a facebook page) start a photography business. I book portrait shoots up the wazoo and learned that I could pursue this hobby as an actual career, but never thought it would happen so fast. I booked my first wedding through a random facebook connection, which started my journey of gaining experience in the wedding industry. I booked second shooting gigs and another wedding as a lead photographer, and before I knew it my weekends were packed with weddings and lifestyle shoots. It was so exciting and I couldn't believe I was actually pursing my dreams. But with all of this exciting new work on my plate, I found myself struggling to find a happy balance between building my portfolio, working a day job, spending time with my friends and family, and finding time for me. Before I knew it I was over whelmed and over worked, which lead to countless nights blowing off friends to stay up way too late editing. The few times that I have spent time with friends has left me feeling so rejuvenated and happy, and I know that in order to keep myself sane in 2014, I need to make time to unwind and relax. I know that I need to dedicate myself to my business and I'm so excited to keep pursing this dream, but I can't do it at the expense of my sanity and friendships.

It's been the year of new beginnings. In August, Jack got down on one knee and asked me to spend the rest of my life with him. After 10 years of knowing each other, this new change to our relationship has opened so many doors to the amazing future we'll have. We've always known we were going to get married, but now that it's on the horizon and actually happening we are even more exciting to start our lives together as husband and wife.

I'm so excited for the new year and all that it will bring, and I'm so grateful for the amazing year behind us!

2013 in photos

After yesterday's saga of the 2013 year in review, I wanted to reflect once again on the year but through photos and the best memories of each month. 

January: Unofficially started my own photography business and filled every weekend with a photo shoot. Experienced Sundance Film Festival by waiting in long lines and crashing hollywood parties. 

February: Had a relaxing weekend get-a-way exploring Occidental and the Northern coast

March: Celebrated turning 25 with a surprise party with the most amazing friends. Avoided a quarter life crisis by watching the sun set over the ocean and telling hilarious stories around a campfire. 

April: Quit my miserable job. 

May: Surprised myself by crushing 25 miles on my backpacking trip during my first visit to Yosemite. 

June: Second shot my first wedding. 

Snagged an amazing part time job, and enjoyed my last weeks of unemployment with a two week vacation in Utah, enjoying our Park City house and exploring breathtaking Zion National Park.

July: Celebrated 4th of July with great friends, good food, and lots of fireworks. 

Celebrated our sweet friends' wedding.

August: Got engaged to the love of my life

September: Attended the most amazing workshop held by my idol, Jose Villa, and met so many inspiring photographers. 

Photographed my first wedding as the lead shooter.  

Lived my lifelong dream of living in New York during a week long work visit (and found out a week was enough time there for me).

October

Became an official small business owner by registering Anna Marks Photography with the city of San Francisco. 

November

Had the most amazing engagement celebration with our loving friends and family. 

Photographed my second wedding as the lead photographer.

December: Had the most epic Jack and Anna Funday exploring Pescadero, where we discovered a place called Pie Ranch, claimed a deserted small beach as our own, and stumbled upon a truly magical Christmas fair, complete with goat cheese, DIY wreaths, a folk band, and local artisans selling crafts. Spent an amazing week in Park City with my amazing family, relaxing, recharging, and refocusing on what's important.